Dating seven years not married

Mr First Love taught me that with love comes pain, but I’d rather have had both than neither.

Mr Athlete taught me to trust my instincts and listen to my gut.

Now I know this sounds really defeatist, and like I am playing the victim. But that doesn’t change the fact that it’s mighty suspicious how many times I’ve dated men who’ve married the girl right after me.

Nope that makes it sound like I am the one who is lucky and let me tell you, I am not.) See, I have a bit of a history. Sometimes they’re married within months of us breaking up. So I guess what I want to ask is: What the fuck is wrong with me? Plenty more fish in the sea, blah, blah, blah.” You’d be right of course.

Women often opt not to do this because they don’t want to be seen as if they’re being too forward or they’re going to scare the guy away. Better for him to run away now than to waste 10 (or more) years of your life keeping you in a perpetual state of limbo. If a man makes a woman wait that long to marry her it could mean a variety of things.

All of the married men I know said they knew very early it was on the agenda and they simply wanted to make sure they weren’t wrong in their assessment.

Suffice it to say, if a woman makes it plain from the outset what is acceptable in how she’s being treated, it becomes much easier to determine when to work with someone and when to walk away.

And all the men in the middle taught me to be more choosy when it comes to men.

Where women tend to make their mistake is by not making it clear at some point during the relationship what it is they want and what it is they’re looking for.

People, in general, seem to think there’s something wrong with setting up guidelines from day one and making people adhere to those guidelines.

I’m of the mind that since women who want to get married see it as an important milestone in their life, it’d behoove them to make their feelings about that known upfront. If you want something from somebody, you have to say so because, contrary to popular belief, men don’t read minds.

A simple “hey, I’m not interested in dating long term without the potential of marriage in the future so if it’s something you don’t see yourself interested in doing then it’s probably best if we split ways” works wonders. Secondly, if a man is scared of you wanting to be married at some point during your lifetime and runs away, he did you a favor.

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